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Examine room.

Your name is DIRK.

Holy SHIT do you love PUPPETS.

You possess the extreme dexterity to operate your FALSE FRIENDS UNSEEN, that is, when they are not pre-ambulatory through your LOVINGLY IMBUED MECHANIZATION. You dig writing COGNITIVE ALGORITHMS FOR SAID APOCRYPHAL MEN, and you think maybe that's FUCKIN' DOPE. Guess what else is dope? Everything ELSE YOU DO. You're a sickwicked autodidact on ANCIENT CIVILIZATIONS, a selfmade MASTER OF MYTHOLOGUE, and a PRETERNATURAL POPCULTURE ACADEME.

If you weren't so DAMN ALOOF and actually let people GET A LOAD, you might get described all kindsa ways. Maybe tagged as a RENAISSANCE NINJA, PHILOSOPHER PRINCE, and FLASHSTEP PUPPETEER. Or perhaps a PANTHEONIC IRONICIST, GANGSTA LOGICIAN, LUCID WAKER and DERSITE SPY. Screw descriptors though, as if the shits you give ain't nil. You're cool with dabbling in the FINE SEQUENTIAL ARTS, and your work could be viewed by some as BORDERLINE PORNOGRAPHIC. And to those philistines you'll be heard wondering, what the fuck do you mean BORDERLINE?

Against the better judgment of one your age, you BUILD ROBOTS, SET THEM TO KILL MODE, AND SPAR WITH THEM TO DEATH. That is, when you're not SENDIFICATING THEM TO FRIENDS, or DUELING THEM WITH RAP LYRICS. But you try to cool it on the deathmatch stuff when your BRO is looking, which is virtually NEVER. And considering he's had a reputation staked on some order of MARTIAL NOBILITY, this strikes you as a STAGGERING OVERSIGHT IN BROTHERLY VIGILANCE. You don't have the HEART to hold it against him, though.

What will you do?

> Dirk: Jut your ass and twitch like a proboscis.


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RSS: Adventure Updates

Posted on 13 April 2017

Got a new trailer for you to check out.

Furthermore, there looks to be a post from ya boy, and mine, (the world's boy, really), Cohen, providing some insight as to the status of the game's development.

It also seems that a famous meat sandwich shop, called Arby's, has tweeted about Homestuck today? Why don't we call that the huge news of the day. Hell, let's agree to regard it as the most significant event of the past eight years.

Also a reminder of the What Pumpkin sale, including discounts on albums.

Posted on 7 April 2017

We Love Fine has begun its traditional 413 promotion. Have at it, folks:



There's also a sale going on at the What Pumpkin store.

Not much else set to drop on 4/13 this year. Should be an update on game status. See you then.

Posted on 12 June 2016 by Andrew

The final Homestuck album Volume 10 has been released. More fantastic music by many familiar names who have contributed to the comic over the years. Thanks to all who came together to make this. It's a great way to cap off an impressive discography, now standing at 27 albums.



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