JOHN: ok, fine.
JADE: thats not down, thats up!
JADE: oh well, at least youre not making those unsettling gestures...
JADE: what are you doing?
JADE: i hope youre not entertaining some awkward train of thought about, uh...
JADE: what is with you??
JADE: today is your birthday, youre supposed to be having fun!
JADE: but youve been so testy, as if youre committed to not having a good time
JOHN: well, maybe i'm just getting a little tired of being stuck on this lame boat!
JOHN: don't you think it's gotten kind of old?
JADE: yeah, i can see how you might find it a little slow here
JADE: i dunno, i havent minded much... maybe its different for me though because i used to live all alone?
JOHN: oh sure, i'm sure it's GREAT for you. you get to spend your days smooching and breaking up with dave sprite and what not, and you can shrink down to any old planet you feel like, any time. whereas i have to make this whole big deal of ASKING you to shrink or unshrink me, and...
JADE: but i dont mind doing that any time!!!
JOHN: i know, but you think i want to bug you about that at the drop of a hat? when you're busy and on dates and stuff? i just happen to have respect for something called PERSONAL BOUNDARIES, jade.
JOHN: and it's not like there's really anyone else to talk to, except the inscrutable chess people and a bunch of brainless consorts and an idiot cat princess. oh and also nanna, but i mean, she's my grandmother, and she's great, but a guy can only spend so much quality time with his grandmother before he starts to feel like kind of a loser whose friends are too busy to spend time with him!
JADE: john... if you told me this earlier i would have...
JOHN: and i still never visit any interesting dream bubbles, and we can't even finish our cool planet quests because the moment we broke through the window all our denizens decided to go back to sleep, and...
JOHN: i guess what i'm saying is, i'm MORE than ready to get to the other window and meet our friends and other new people and stuff.
JOHN: are you sure you can't make the ship go faster???
JADE: were already going as fast as i can make us go
JOHN: and how fast is that again?
JADE: about the speed of light!
JOHN: well, can't you use your space powers and bump it up a notch?
JADE: no! nothing can go faster than light john
JADE: unless you teleport of course
JOHN: and why can't you teleport us again?
JADE: i already explained this! i cant do that here, its not within the domain of the green sun which gives me those powers!
JOHN: is that why we can't go faster than light either?
JADE: no thats just a regular law of physics!!! jeez
JOHN: ok, i mean, i know that. but this isn't really a regular place, right?
JOHN: isn't the speed of light like a thousand miles a second? so what does that really mean here? are miles and seconds the same here as on earth? how does this nonsense dimension we're racing through jive with all the relativity mumbo jumbo?
JADE: ok first of all, thats not even close to the speed of light
JADE: light travels at a hundred and eighty six thousand miles per second no matter what frame of reference youre in... even this one!
JADE: second of all special relativity and comparing laws of physics between different frames of reference, those are tricky issues to talk about!
JADE: but id be more than happy to talk about them if youd like. actually i would enjoy that because i never really get to talk about science wi...
JOHN: no, i don't want to talk about physics! i don't know anything about the laws of physics, because they are hard and boring.
JOHN: i simply would like them to behave in a way that is most convenient to ME and MY LIFE! is that really asking too much?
JADE: yes as a matter of fact it is!
JOHN: well, guess what? SCIENCE IS STUPID BULLSHIT!!!
JADE: you take that back!!!!!
JOHN: magic is awesome.
JOHN: science blows.
JOHN: the end.
JADE: what is that?