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[A6I4] ==>

FUCK IT.
I'LL JUST TYPE IN ALL BIG LETTERS. EVEN THE U'S. WHO CARES.
Aw, looks like someone just took his first big step toward growing up!
ACTUALLY, TYPING THIS WAY IS A LOT EASIER. LOOKS LIKE I WIN THIS ROUND ASSHOLE.
Win what? I was the one advocating the use of caps lock in the first place, doofus.
DON'T ANTAGONIZE ME. YOU AREN'T A FUNNY PERSON.
I CAN TELL YOU THINK YOU'RE FUNNY. I MAY HAVE PROBLEMS LEARNING.
BUT I KNOW WHEN A PIECE OF GARBAGE IS TRYING TO BE FUNNY. UNSUCCESSFULLY.
You're right. I do think I'm funny sometimes. Maybe I'm wrong though.
HAHA! YOU ARE. JUST A WRONG AND UNFUNNY GUY.
We all have our flaws to overcome. I do my best, just like you.
Think of all you've done in spite of your learning problems. You don't let your disability hold you back, do you?
I GUESS.
You won that game of chess with that stupid gambit. Switching the hats, remember? It was a lame ploy, and totally not in the spirit of the rules, but it got under her skin enough to force a loss anyway.
You also hired Jack to murder your sister. Which was a dick move, but reasonably clever.
YES.
THOSE THINGS I DID WERE GREAT.
Well, they weren't great so much as terrible. But the point is you can accomplish anything if you put your mind to it.
Just because you struggle with learning doesn't mean you can't realize your destiny. You just have to work a little harder at it.
And if you're dealt a lousy hand - and you definitely were with this shitty solo session - then you have to work even harder.
THAT'S WHAT I'M GOING TO DO.
I know you will.
You are going to prove all the haters wrong, exceed your own limitations by miles, and accomplish more than you ever dreamed possible.
Yours is quite an inspiring story, actually. It's just a shame that all of your accomplishments will be so horrible.
But that's really beside the point.
YEAH, I ALREADY KNEW I WAS INCREDIBLE AND SPECIAL.
WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO. INSPIRE ME. SAVE YOUR BREATH FUCKHEAD.
No, I don't give a shit about making you feel better about yourself.
I'm not your guardian or your sprite or your exile or your fucking life coach. I'm just saying some things that are true through the narrative prompt.
Take the facts or leave them!
MOST OF YOUR FACTS ARE BORING SO FAR.
I WOULD LIKE BETTER AND MORE USEFUL FACTS. RIGHT NOW.
You may be destined for bigger things, but you're still an atrocious, stupid child.
And you may have won the "game" with your sister, but that doesn't mean it was the best thing for your development as a person.
You had her dream self killed, which is not an opportunity your species typically gets. So she died prematurely, instead of allowing the conflict within you to settle itself naturally.
In short, you forced your predomination to happen a little too early, and now you're stuck.
STUCK?
Yes. Your personality is stuck in some sort of cantankerous prepubescent limbo. You are going to be a stunted, miserable tool forever.
WELL, HOW LONG WAS I EVEN SUPPOSED TO WAIT. FOR THAT TWEE BITCH TO GET OUT OF MY SKULL.
It's kind of sad. You don't really know anything about your own species, do you?
AND I GUESS YOU DO?
Uh, yeah?
Pretty much everything.
TELL ME THEN.
No.
GOD. DAMN IT.

> [A6I4] ==>


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RSS: Adventure Updates


Gigapause: Commence.



Posted on 13 April 2014 by Andrew

Happy 4/13, a.k.a. 5 years of Homestuck being a thing! Since I know how much you like things, to celebrate I thought I would show you another thing that's been in the works for a while.



It's a new webcomic based on Homestuck, called Paradox Space! Have a look. That is all I will say about it here. But if you would like to know what the heck this ACTUALLY IS, here is a permalink to the news post where I talk about such matters.

Posted on 3 Mar 2014 by Andrew

2014 What Pumpkin Convention Schedule ... over there! ->

The What Pumpkin crew will be quite active on the con circuit this year. 11 cons by my count (for now). Take a look at the schedule, and make your plans accordingly!

What Pumpkin will be setting up a booth in all these cons where you can buy stuff and meet some friendly WP folk. I personally will only be attending two or three of these. I'm not sure which ones yet. I don't think I can lock myself into anything definite yet, since all that traveling is incredibly time consuming and tends to derail work. That's sort of what happened last year. I traveled way too much, and it really messed me up! So work schedule permitting, I'll probably pick a couple of these later and make some "surprise appearances". That way, if you happen to see me at a convention, you can be 100% certain that our encounter will be a result of PURE DESTINY.

Posted on 24 Jan 2014 by Andrew

introdoucing, 20104............ the NEWD YEAR

Gigapause status: STILL GIGAPAUSED.

It's almost over, right? Um, no, sorry. I still have no time estimate, or specific date I am shooting for. 4/13 would be the COOLEST date to shoot for, right? I doubt that's realistic though. Because in spite of my most religious wishes every single day, magic keeps on being fake. THANKS, "god".

What is the status, then? The status is this. Since pausing, basically all I have been doing is writing. No drawing or animation yet. Writing, writing, writing. Writing for Homestuck, and writing for the adventure game. More time has been allocated to the latter. The game is a big, big project. Let's not kid ourselves here. It's like this whole new major story and everything, fueled by millions of dollars. That's a very different situation from Homestuck, which is usually fueled by approximately zero dollars.

Homestuck probably needs another month of writing before I can start making panels. Not even to speak of Flash work. And of course, game development looms over everything as well. This feels totally different from the usual routine of write-draw-post, write-draw-post, write-draw-post, ad infinitum. Writing everything out beforehand is peculiar. And by peculiar I mean "totally conventional", in most other creative contexts. Let's see how that approach pans out. (You go out on a limb and guess it will result in the same silly bullshit as always.)

WHAT ELSE IS GOING ON?

Kickstarter - Speaking of the game, I sent out a backer update just before the newd year. The same update just went out to paypal backers too (it took a while to set up a system for that). If you backed the project but didn't notice an update, you might want to check your email. If you didn't back it, sorry these updates are <shhhh>secret</shhhh>. I mean, not really. The info gets "leaked" everywhere, if you know where to look. The point is, *I'M* technically not supposed to be the one tell you. Get it? Oh. You don't? Me neither.

One question I feel like I should answer out in the open even though I kinda thought it was obvious (there is no such thing as obvious) since I see it come up so much: yes, you will be able to purchase the game, even if you did not back the Kickstarter!

Contest - In the near future, I'm going to be putting out some neat things through We Love Fine. WLF is a cool company that makes a lot of nice stuff, that you will find particularly interesting if you are into "the fandoms". Do you like fandoms? When I was a kid we didn't even have those. All we had were shitty Atari games, and spankings.

But before they formally launch any Homestuck stuff, they're running a fun shirt design contest. There are sweet cash prizes. Hey, only participate if you think is sounds fun though. Most people won't win, because that's what a contest is, according to the way that common word is classically defined. I ain't out to waste anyone's time! I do hope plenty of people submit designs though. There's some nutty stuff rolling in. People will laugh at me if I pick the naked Gamzee shirt. DON'T MAKE ME PICK THE NAKED GAMZEE SHIRT!

Another Secret Project - Remember a while ago, I mysteriously mumbled something about a secret project? And then it came along, and it turned out to be Namco High? This is like that again. Except it's not a dating sim. Or a game, or anything like that. Also, it doesn't involve video game characters you've never heard of. It is a much more Homestuck-focused thing. That's all I'm gonna say! Ok, I lied, I will say one more thing: it's going to be really cool, and you will wonder where it has been all your life.

Vinyl Figures - These are up in the store now! For actual sale. Hehe... look at em!



Posted on 20 Dec 2013 by Andrew



Posted on 11 Dec 2013 by Andrew

Behold, it is the festive dump of none other than Father Christmas himself! *Puts on Santa suit, dives head-first onto Slip N Slide full of eggnog.*

But then I stagger to my feet, wring my beard into a glass, add a pinch of nutmeg, and apologize for ruining Christmas. These goods are now available for preorder.



Posted on 28 Nov 2013 by Andrew



This week I give you: THE MOTHERLOAD

Tune in next week for: THE FATHERDUMP

Posted on 13 Oct 2013 by Andrew

Homestuck book 3 and Problem Sleuth book 5 are here! The Homestuck book contains Act 3. The Problem Sleuth book is the final volume of the series.




(The cover of PS5 glows in the dark by the way.)

And now that the Problem Sleuth series is wrapped up, you can get the full set. Dedicating this much paper to three cartoon detectives trying to leave an office should be illegal. But it isn't, and we are exploiting that fact to our advantage here.





2014 Conventions Schedule

Anime Boston / Boston, MA / March 21-23 / Booth # 233, 234

MegaCon / Orlando, FL / March 21-23 / Booth # 1083, 1182

Emerald City Comicon / Seattle, WA / March 28-30 / Booth # 1420

Salt Lake Comic Con (April) / Salt Lake City, UT / April 17-19 / Booth # 1001

WonderCon / Anaheim, CA / April 18-20 / Booth # 1500, 1502

Calgary Expo / Calgary, AB, Canada / April 24-27 / Booths BF 3726 and BF 3725

C2E2 / Chicago, IL / April 25-27 / Booth # 268

Anime Expo / Los Angeles, CA /July 3-6 / Booth # TBA

Florida Supercon / Miami, FL / July 3-6 / Booth # 911, 913, 915

Dragon Con / Atlanta, GA / Aug 29-Sept 1 / Booth # TBA

Salt Lake Comic Con (September) / Salt Lake City, UT / Sept 4-6 / Booth # 1001

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