GT: Sounds straight forward enough. GT: Whats the code? uu: IT IS: uu: uROBuROS uu: BE CAREFUL. THAT IS CASE SENSITIVE. GT: Ok. uu: I WOULD TELL YOU THE CODE FOR MY SISTER'S JUJU. BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS. uu: A WHILE AGO I WENT TO GET HER JUJU. BUT THE FUCKING THING WAS GONE ALREADY. uu: I THINK THE CRAFTY BITCH ALREADY GAVE IT AWAY. GT: Hmm. GT: We could try to guess it maybe? uu: FORGET IT. THE POSSIBILITIES ARE PROBABLY INFINITE. GT: Yeah. Youre probably right. GT: So what sort of magical properties does your juju have? uu: I DON'T KNOW EXACTLY WHAT IT DOES. uu: I HAVE NEVER TRIED IT. BECAUSE IT WAS TOO PRECIOUS TO ME. uu: WHATEVER MINE DOES. MY SISTER'S PROBABLY DOES THE OPPOSITE THING. uu: BUT WHAT THEY DO INDIVIDUALLY. PALES IN COMPARISON TO WHAT THEY CAN DO TOGETHER. uu: WHEN COMBINED. THE JUJUS BECOME THE MOST MAGIC THING EVER. uu: THEY CAN MAKE ALL YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE. AND EVERYTHING THAT NEEDS TO HAPPEN. WILL MAGICALLY FALL INTO PLACE. GT: Really? GT: That sounds almost too good to be true. GT: If you dont even know what your juju does by itself why do you think they do that together? uu: BECAUSE I BELIEVE IT WITH ALL MY FUCKING HEART. YOU STUPID PIECE OF SHIT. GT: Oh why didnt you say so! Thats all i needed to hear!!! GT: See youre getting the hang of hope already. uu: YEAH. I GUESS. uu: THE BOTTOM LINE IS. DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. uu: JUST TAKE MY JUJU. HAVE FAITH IN YOUR PATRON DUDE. AND LEAVE EVERYTHING TO ME. GT: Roger that mr lord. GT: Say. Dont you have a name? We know your sisters name... cant we know yours now too? uu: NO. uu: THERE ARE MANY THINGS YOU SHOULDNT KNOW ABOUT ME. FOR YOUR OWN GOOD. uu: IF YOU KNEW THEM. IF YOU EVEN KNEW MY NAME. uu: YOU WOULD SHIT YOUR PANTS HARDER THAN ANY HUMAN EVER HAS. uu: SO YOU MAY CONTINUE REFERRING TO ME AS YOUR LORD. GT: Well i surely dont want to spoil any clean trousers. GT: Even though your warning sounds a little hyperbolic i will trust you. GT: Um. My lord. GT: Heheheh when i call you that people could mistake our conversation for a nefarious and underhanded collusion among felons! uu: SHUT THE FUCK UP. GT: As you wish... MY LORD. GT: HEHEHEHEHEH! uu: UGH. GT: So lord. May i ask... GT: Why are you giving me your juju if it is so dear to you? GT: Is your commitment to this manbro boypledge of yours really that strong? GT: If so im really impressed. I would have a really hard time giving my favorite stuff away to a total stranger. uu: DON'T FLATTER YOURSELF. uu: THE GESTURE IS RELATIVELY MEANINGLESS. THE TRUTH OF THE MATTER IS. uu: I HAVE FOUND A NEW JUJU. A MUCH BETTER JUJU. uu: A JUJU THAT MAKES ALL OTHER JUJUS LOOK LIKE FRIVOLOUS CHILDISH NONSENSE IN COMPARISON. GT: Yeah? Then that is quite a treasure you found. GT: Where did you get it? Did you plunder a tomb or such? uu: SORT OF. uu: IT WAS EXCAVATED FROM THIS PLANET'S SOIL. uu: ALONG WITH SOME OTHER ARTIFACTS. uu: AND GIVEN TO ME. uu: BY MY INFURIATING ASSHOLE MENTOR. uu: A MAN WHO IS AN INVINCIBLE CLOWN. GT: Well that sounds nice of him. He cant be that much of an asshole if he gave you such a nice present can he? uu: NO, BELIEVE ME. HE CAN. GT: I had a clown give me a nice present once too. I would never have met my good friend mr erisol without the kindness of that clown. uu: YEAH. IT'S THE SAME FUCKING CLOWN SOMEHOW. uu: I'M TELLING YOU. THIS ASSHOLE IS ETERNAL. AND THE BEINGS HE CREATES FOR YOUR PARTY ARE DISGUSTING ABOMINATIONS. uu: BUT WHAT CAN YOU DO? NOTHING, I HAVE LEARNED. HE'S A CLOWN. THE RULES ARE. CLOWNS CAN DO WHATEVER THEY WANT. BECAUSE OF MIRACLES. AND HOLD NO ACCOUNTABILITY FOR THEIR DEEDS. uu: I DON'T LIKE IT. BUT THOSE ARE THE RULES. GT: So whats this juju he gave you? uu: SOMETHING VERY SPECIAL. uu: A WONDERFUL LITTLE FALSE MAN.
Hey check it out. Every week we'll be revealing some new troll characters from Hiveswap until Act 2 is out. Follow the Troll Call here, and meet the first two here. Expect a few more surprises like this to drop in coming weeks.