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1/19/15 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
1/16/15 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
1/14/15 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
1/12/15 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
1/9/15 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
1/7/15 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
1/5/15 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
1/2/15 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/31/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/29/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/26/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/24/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/22/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/19/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/17/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/15/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/12/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/10/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/8/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/5/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/3/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
12/1/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
11/28/14 - "[S][A6A6I4] ====>"
11/26/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
11/24/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
11/21/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
11/19/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
11/17/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
11/14/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
11/11/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
11/10/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
11/7/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
11/5/14 - "[A6A6I4] ====>"
11/3/14 - "ACT 6 ACT 6 INTERMISSION 4"
11/1/14 - "ACT 6 ACT 6 ACT 4"
10/25/14 - "ACT 6 ACT 6 INTERMISSION 3"
10/25/14 - "[S] GAME OVER."
10/17/14 - "ACT 6 ACT 6 ACT 3"
10/16/13 - "[A6A6I2] ====>"
10/16/13 - "[A6A6I2] ====>"
10/16/13 - "[A6A6I2] ====>"
10/16/13 - "[A6A6I2] ====>"
10/16/13 - "[A6A6I2] ====>"
10/16/13 - "[A6A6I2] ====>"

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Adventure Log

View oldest to newest

06/04/07 - "With elf powers, order the pony to trample children and man"
06/04/07 - "First, be the pony. Second, trample the children and the man"
06/04/07 - "bite off your own leg and use it to play fetch with the pony"
06/04/07 - "Use runes to commune with pony and feed it a majyyk'd carrot"
06/04/07 - "Use magical prowess to summon Moscovite elves."
06/04/07 - "Enact Total War: set house on fire and flee east to Moscow"
06/04/07 - "invite the horse, children and madman in for tea party"
06/04/07 - "Continue your downward spiral of mental instability"
06/04/07 - "Throw two kids in the chimney. Maybe it'll smoke out elves"
06/04/07 - "Tie kids together with the horse and use as battering ram"
06/04/07 - "Give bus of children to elves so you can go inside"
06/04/07 - "Go on a hunt for children to repay the elf for his kindness."
06/04/07 - "Dig up stump"
06/04/07 - "Cast fireball at bungalow, so you stay extra warm tonight"
06/04/07 - "Cut open the horse to sleep inside for the cold night"
06/04/07 - "Wish to get out of jail, then trample the elf with the pony."
06/04/07 - "Ask for a pony. Ask for second wish by promising twin babies"
06/04/07 - "Offer the elf a baby in exchange for one wish."
06/04/07 - "Strike the elf."
06/04/07 - "With your trusty Hunk's Junk magazine, forge a sword"
06/04/07 - "Recite spell while spilling blood, invoking elves and such"
06/04/07 - "Using key, carve spell into stomach invoking elves and such"
06/04/07 - "Using key, carve spell into pumpkin invoking elves and such"
06/04/07 - "turn around."
06/04/07 - "Continue"
06/04/07 - "Grab the other guy's hand and run off into the forest"
06/04/07 - "Load gun and fire at stump, while singing King Henry V"
06/04/07 - "Look around and thank guy for quick thinking with harpoon"
06/04/07 - "POINT HUGEIFIER AT PUMPKINHEAD AND ACTIVATE"
06/04/07 - "Take off helmet and use it for flotation. Flip switch again"
06/04/07 - "Climb down ladder and randomly press buttons on panel"
06/04/07 - "ask harpooned man where rest of the few thousand pieces are"
06/04/07 - "Apologize to the man."
06/04/07 - "Pull lever and reel in the harpoon"
06/04/07 - "Use harpoon to get across to building and shoot down hole"
06/04/07 - "Survey surroundings, possibly sneaking a bite of ambergris"
06/04/07 - "Try to climb up the rope thing."
06/04/07 - "Jump out the window."
06/04/07 - "Bring the gun along in case you have to off yourself."
06/04/07 - "Oh shit"
06/04/07 - "Carve pumpkins to match faces on the wall and put them in"
06/04/07 - "Plug up the hole with a pumpkin."
06/04/07 - "Drink as much as you can as fast as you can."
06/04/07 - "Put it in the sad recess"
06/04/07 - "Carve the pumpkin into a surprised face!"
06/04/07 - "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD GO THROUGH THE DOOR!!"
06/04/07 - "Play the get out of jail free card"
06/04/07 - "Eat the pumpkin portions just cut out of the head-pumpkin"
06/04/07 - "Use intestine like scarf / Climb intestine"
06/04/07 - "Greet him"
06/04/07 - "Return to the courtyard to show off new suit."
06/04/07 - "Build pumpkin-armour."
06/04/07 - "Check that door to see if it is locked."
06/04/07 - "Open pumpkin and cuddle whatever is inside!"
06/04/07 - "Place head on "X""
06/04/07 - "Drill through door"
06/04/07 - "Be the other guy."
06/04/07 - "Ask man to throw intestine up to you"
06/04/07 - "Greet him"
06/04/07 - "Go to window to show off new helmet"
06/04/07 - "Carve holes for mouth and eyes"
06/04/07 - "Ease head out of hole."
06/04/07 - "Dig deeper! Search for Prime Minister's gold hookers"
06/04/07 - "Eat whatever is in the hole"
06/04/07 - "Clean the place up a bit."
06/04/07 - "Climb intestine"
06/04/07 - "Unpause"
06/04/07 - "Pause"
06/04/07 - "Cry."
06/04/07 - "Make a robot out of that guy"
06/04/07 - "With great prescience, move away from end of the intestine"
06/04/07 - "Examine that rope-like object"
06/04/07 - "Get a bachelor's degree in robotics"
06/04/07 - "Get down tonight."
06/04/07 - "Rebuild logorg"
06/04/07 - "Sacrifice your soul to the heathen gods."
06/04/07 - "Make a little love."
06/04/07 - "Wreck(Reek?) havoc"
06/04/07 - "Put your brain inside Logorg's head."
06/04/07 - "Use logorg as a battering ram to open the door"
06/04/07 - "Command Logorg to dance"
06/04/07 - "Continue to enjoy Hunk Rump"
06/04/07 - "Drill through the wall right next to the door."
06/04/07 - "Drill hole through door"
06/04/07 - "Daub pictures of naked ladies on the wall with blood."
06/04/07 - "Proceed."
06/04/07 - "Wave legs in the air"
06/04/07 - "Poke head through hole and wave."
06/04/07 - "Drill through the floor"
06/04/07 - ">unpause"
06/04/07 - ">status"
06/04/07 - "Apologize to guard's body"
06/04/07 - "Use guard as battering ram on door"
06/04/07 - "Use guards pants to lasso keys through the opening in door"
06/04/07 - "Eat the pumpkin."
06/04/07 - "Leap over him in a desperate bid for freedom."
06/04/07 - "Try waking him by peeing on him"
06/04/07 - "Check on knocked out guard"
06/04/07 - "BARF!"
06/04/07 - "Spit pee at man out the window."
06/04/07 - "Serenade the guy about how you want the key"
06/04/07 - "Keep singing until guy drills through floor"
06/04/07 - "hollow out pumpkin, wear as helmet in case ceiling collapses"
06/04/07 - "Sing 'malaguena'"
06/04/07 - "Drill a hole in the floor."
06/04/07 - "Toss the contraption into the air to give it added lift"
06/04/07 - "Hook key to ladder and extend to jail cell guy"
06/04/07 - "Make clay from dirt and pee, use it to glue ladder into pole"
06/04/07 - "Hook key to the end of ladder and extend it to jail cell guy"
06/04/07 - "Turn long ladder into stilts"
06/04/07 - "Ignore all future input from betelgeuse"
06/04/07 - "Talk to the guy in the jail cell"
06/04/07 - "Use ladder as battering ram"
06/04/07 - "Pretend broken ladder is broken train track"
06/04/07 - "Use key on door."
06/04/07 - "Go through door."
06/04/07 - "Rub key on chest."
06/04/07 - "Throw shoe at key"
06/04/07 - "Search room thoroughly for pumpkin"
06/04/07 - "Say hello to the pumpkin"
06/04/07 - "Examine floor"
06/04/07 - "Ask dungeon master if there is one fucking way out of room"
06/04/07 - "Knock on door."
06/04/07 - "Do a dance"
06/04/07 - "Open door"
06/04/07 - "Pee out the window in an attempt to bring him back"
06/04/07 - "Loudly tell that guy to pick up key and try it on the door."
06/04/07 - "Throw the key down to that guy so he can open that door"
06/03/07 - "Look for keyhole"
06/03/07 - "Grow two muscular arms with which the manhandle the key"
06/03/07 - "Graft pumpkin to yourself so that you have one hideous arm"
06/03/07 - "Attempt to pry open window."
06/03/07 - "Start Jailbreak Adventure"




RSS: Adventure Updates

Posted on 19 January 2015 by Andrew

So what do we call this pause? I've been batting ideas around all day. We could go with the obvious choice, the MINIGIGAPAUSE. Or maybe, MEGAPAUSE 2: BACK IN THE MEGASADDLE. Or if that makes too much sense, we could always settle on the MICROTERAPAUSE. As you can see, there are so many incredibly intelligent and meaningful things we could call this pause. Deciding how to refer to the pause is an exercise that I will leave to the reader. Feel free to discuss the matter with friends. Or strangers. Anyone who will listen really. If they start to run away, I strongly recommend you chase them.

Why don't we say that A665 begins on 4/13. That's a fun number that we all can get excited about. I have a lot of catch-up work to do between now and then. Not the least of which is drawing the actual content to be posted. But also a lot of gamedev work. Game production is rolling pretty hot right now. Stuff is being churned out almost faster than I can keep track of. Did I mention? I accidentally started running a game studio a little while ago. Whoops, sorry about that. There are all these people being paid to make things happen, and I have to be like "Yeah, keep doing that stuff, everybody." It's getting pretty easy to lose track of how many people work for What Pumpkin. My last estimate was somewhere between 30 and 1000. The true figure is a very frisky moving target.

A6A6A5, a.k.a. Caliborn's Masterpiece, is actually done. It's probably better to hold off posting it until 4/13, when more content will soon follow aftewards. I am sure pausing on that note for months would mess with your head a lot more than the note we're already pausing on. I sometimes feel I have at least a modest responsibility to manage your sanity. It'll be tough sitting on this content though. Tougher than sitting on all of A664 for the better part of a year. I don't think it is out of line to describe it as the best material this website will ever exhibit. It will be all down hill from there, in every direction. Even up.

Speaking of sanity management, way back when, I was pretty on the fence about posting A664 spaced out over months like I did, vs. all at once. Doing the latter in hindsight probably would have been a fucked up thing to do to the internet though. The GAME OVER fallout alone was a bit much as it was. Including it in tandem with the rest of it? Not sure what to make of that. Let's review the CONTENT CRUSH that would have entailed. Bad Anime -> Game Over -> Sadstuck -> Lowas Quest -> 100 retconned panels of oil -> A bunch of other shit -> Punky Serket -> Fantroll Storytime -> 8 password pages -> The Kiss On Horse Mountain -> and finally -> The Punchline. You know, that's an awful lot of baloney to publish. I think the fell-swoop reaction to all that would have been quite a thing to behold, but also, perhaps an irresponsible thing to do to a hapless fanbase after a year in hibernation. I'm told that in 2015, young people are heavily susceptible to "the feels", and trifling with those forces could be injurious to their future development. Wait, did that just sound like something your grandpa would say? Mother fuck, where did I put my cane. Oh right, I snapped it in half from shaking it at the sky.

I may have been in the process of making a point there, but we're going to have to pick this up another time. The comic isn't going to pause itself!!!

Posted on 7 January 2015 by Andrew

CRITICAL HORSE ADJUSTMENT

Over the last couple months, I have been surreptitiously collapsing several update horses into single, bigger horses. This means A6A6I4 is going to end a little sooner than previously advertised. Same total page count, but finishing sooner. Please consult the important horse calendar below.



So what happens when A6A6I4 is done? I'm not quite sure yet. I'm still working on everything that comes after that. I've written it mostly, but haven't drawn anything yet. There will almost certainly be another pause, but I'm not sure how long it will be yet. I will let you know after 1/19.

Posted on 9 December 2014 by Andrew

Here is one last drop of cool stuff for you to buy before your chimneys are plundered by a mythical oaf.

A new one of these guys, who is red:


Charms!:


Cute stickers?? (yes):



Posted on 30 October 2014 by Andrew

Adventure Game Update

I am letting this one be viewable to the general public. (It will also be posted to the backer page of the Kickstarter.)



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