TT: Best birthday ever?
TT: Or best FUCKING birthday ever.
GG: In the interest of appeasing the irony gods, let's go with the latter.
TT: Whatever role I played in ruining your party.
TT: Sorry about that.
GG: Oh lord. The LAST thing I give a shit about is my stupid "sweet sixteen".
GG: What a farce. I was trying to act as if we were all living normal well adjusted lives, albeit in a marvelous fantasy setting populated by skeletons.
GG: And if only we just had some cake and wore some hats and I blew out all the candles in one big puff, we could pretend all the problems we had with each other would magically stop existing.
GG: And the most horrifying thing of all is, I actually got my wish!
GG: Haha. Thanks, Calliope.
GG: Oh well. I'm sure she had good intentions.
TT: I still think I've been pretty lousy to you. I had my head up my ass for a while there.
TT: By the time your birthday came around, I was kinda freaking out about Jake.
TT: I thought I had the situation under control. But I didn't. Not just with Jake, but with respect to pretty much everything.
GG: I understand.
GG: Boy, you really let him have it back there!
TT: I guess so.
GG: I had a similar meltdown with him earlier. I'm not going to lie. It felt really good.
GG: At least, it did at the time.
GG: I only wish I could have stayed as lucid as you during our...
GG: How did you manage that?
TT: It wasn't on purpose. Actually if I had a choice, I probably would have just said, fuck it. Sugar shock my brain, please.
TT: Suffice to say, I have trouble escaping from myself. It's kind of a problem. Let's not talk about it though. Please continue.
GG: So instead of keeping my cool like you, I just started gushing over him like a lovestruck loon, surrendering any sliver of dignity I might have earned by telling him off earlier.
GG: I just cannot believe some of the things I said. Oh God. I told him I wanted to get married and have babies!!!
TT: Yeah but to be fair, by the time you came looking for me, all three of you were saying that to anything that moved.
GG: I know! But...
GG: It's one thing to write off something you say to an altered state of mind. But what makes the admission so mortifying to me is...
GG: I actually MEANT it.
GG: And I'm sure he must know that by now.
GG: And now I feel so humiliated I just want to die.
GG: I would ask him to shoot me right here, if I could bring myself to say a word to him.
TT: Somehow I don't think he's up to the task.
TT: Which is doubly unfortunate, since that's literally what we all came here to do.
TT: Speaking personally, I'd probably run this sword through my own dick before I could bring myself to kill Roxy. Even for her own good.
TT: When the chips are down, I guess that's how much of a badass I really am.
GG: We are all such WINNERS.
TT: Yeah, our moxie's off the fuckin' charts.