carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling centaursTesticle [CT]
CG: EQUIUS, ARE YOU THERE?
CT: D --> Yes
CG: OK, GOOD
CG: ARE YOU STILL REALLY STRONG?
CG: LIKE, IS THAT STILL YOUR THING?
CT: D --> I am still e%ceptionally STRONG
CT: D --> Strength continues to be my STRONGEST attribute
CG: OK GOOD.
CG: I GUESS THAT WAS A PRETTY DUMB QUESTION.
CG: I NEED YOUR HELP.
CT: D --> With what
CG: GAMZEE IS ON A RAMPAGE
CG: HE'S GOING TO KILL US ALL IF WE DON'T STOP HIM.
CT: D --> You mean
CT: D --> The highb100d
CG: YEAH, I GUESS
CT: D --> Oh dear
CT: D --> Are you saying the highb100d has finally embraced his position atop the hierarchy
CG: NO I'M SAYING HE FUCKING SNAPPED AND WANTS TO MURDER US ALL
CT: D --> Yes e%actly
CG: DAMMIT, WHY DOES THIS CONVERSATION HAVE TO BE SO PREDICTABLY TERRIBLE
CG: ALL I'M ASKING YOU TO DO
CG: NO, ORDERING YOU TO DO
CG: IS GO FIND GAMZEE AND BEAT HIM TO DEATH WITH YOUR BARE HANDS, OR POSSIBLY TWO HALVES OF A BROKEN BOW, BEFORE HE KILLS ANYONE ELSE.
CT: D --> I certainly appreciate the debauchery inherent in receiving an order of such gravity from a rogue-b100ded foulmouth
CT: D --> But
CT: D --> I'm not entirely positive I can raise a hand to the highb100d
CT: D --> It wouldn't be my place
CG: OH MY GOD
CG: WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO DIFFICULT IN ALL THE MOST FUCKED UP WAYS POSSIBLE?
CG: YOU'RE GETTING OFF ON THIS AREN'T YOU
CT: D --> Uh
CG: IF YOU ASK ME FOR A TOWEL I AM GOING TO FLIP MY SHIT RIGHT OFF THIS FUCKING METEOR
CG: IT WILL JUST BE ME, SPINNING AND SPINNING AND SPINNING INTO ENDLESS NOTHING, SCREAMING
CT: D --> No, I have a sufficient supply of drying utilities
CG: I FORBID YOU FROM GETTING OFF ON ANY OF THIS
CG: DON'T GET OFF ON MY ORDERS, DON'T GET OFF ON PHRASES LIKE FUCK FUCK FUCKETY FUCK, AND DON'T GET OFF ON ANY SORT OF WEIRD ADMIRATION YOU MIGHT BE HARBORING FOR A MURDEROUS CLOWN WITH PURPLE BLOOD
CT: D --> The b100d
CT: D --> It is just so
CT: D --> E%quisitely purple
CG: ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?
CT: D --> Yes
CT: D --> But 100k
CT: D --> The situation is very delicate I believe
CT: D --> The highb100d would benefit from a proper enculturation into the aristocracy
CG: I DON'T THINK HE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOUR ETIQUETTE LESSONS, OR HOW A TRUE GENTLEMAN IS TO GO ABOUT HANDLING A PROPER FUCKING HORSE TEAT
CG: SERIOUSLY, PEOPLE ARE IN DANGER HERE.
CT: D --> I'll take measures to ensure our comrades aren't injured
CG: OK, AND?
CT: D --> Well
CG: BUT YOU WON'T FIGHT HIM, IS THAT IT
CT: D --> If it comes to close quarters skirmish, I will try to be prepared
CG: HOW FUCKING REASSURING!
CG: YOU ARE SUCH AN IDIOT, I DON'T GET IT
CG: YOU KISS THE GROUND THIS LUNATIC WALKS ON BECAUSE HE HAS PURPLE BLOOD
CG: BUT THAT DOESN'T STOP YOU FROM RIPPING ON ERIDAN, I KNOW FOR A FACT YOU DON'T LIKE HIM
CG: AND HIS BLOOD IS EVEN PURPLIER, ISN'T IT?
CT: D --> Yes
CT: D --> That's different
CT: D --> He is a sea dweller
CT: D --> Our feud is codified in tradition
CT: D --> Neigh, we are obligated to be at odds
CT: D --> It's dignified
CG: OK FINE, THEN SPEAKING OF WHICH
CG: HE'S ON A MURDEROUS RAMPAGE TOO
CT: D --> He is
CT: D --> How many of us are rampaging murderously, e%actly
CG: I DON'T KNOW, AT LEAST THREE PROBABLY, BUT WHO EVEN KNOWS AT THIS POINT
CG: THE POINT IS, IF YOU SEE HIM, WOULD YOU MIND SNAPPING HIS STUPID WAND IN HALF OR SOMETHING?
CG: AND THEN CHOKE HIM TO DEATH WITH HIS OWN SHITTY PRETENTIOUS SCARF.
CT: D --> Do I really have to
CG: GOD, WHAT IS THE PROBLEM NOW?
CT: D --> I'd prefer not to interact with him
CT: D --> It's primarily that his advances make me uncomfortable
CG: I WOULD HIGH FIVE YOU IF IT WOULDN'T SHATTER EVERY BONE IN MY HAND.
CG: AND IF YOU DIDN'T SMELL TERRIBLE.
CG: BUT SERIOUSLY, IF YOU COULD CARRY OUT MY ORDERS IN THE LEAST PERVERSE WAY POSSIBLE, THAT WOULD BE GREAT.
CG: JUST KILL ONE OR MORE OF THOSE ASSHOLES AND GET BACK TO ME, OK?
CG: I NEED YOU TO COME THROUGH FOR ME, BECAUSE WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF MANPOWER HERE.
CT: D --> We are
CG: YES DIDN'T I MENTION? FEFERI, KANAYA AND TAVROS ARE DEAD, SOLLUX IS UNCONSCIOUS, AND TEREZI IS MISSING.
CG: OH GOD, I HOPE SHE'S OK, I SHOULD PROBABLY GO LOOK FOR HER
CT: D --> Oh shoot
CT: D --> E%cuse my vulgarity
CG: I'LL LET IT SLIDE.
CG: JUST DO WHAT I SAY, OK.
CT: D --> I will 100k into it
carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling centaursTesticle [CT]