CG: ANYWAY, IT DOESN'T MATTER ANYMORE. CG: IF WE CAN RIDE THIS OUT FOR A LITTLE LONGER UNTIL THE CRITICAL MOMENT, AND DAVE/ROSE CAN DESTROY THE SUN, JACK SHOULDN'T BE A THREAT. CG: CONVENIENTLY, IF THEY'RE SUCCESSFUL, THAT WILL SIGNAL THE BEGINNING OF OUR OWN ESCAPE PLAN. EB: what is your plan? CG: APPARENTLY THE EXPLOSION WILL BE SO HUGE, IT WILL BE VISIBLE AT GREAT DISTANCES THROUGHOUT THE FURTHEST RING. CG: EVEN FROM DIFFERENT SESSIONS, LIKE YOURS AND OURS. YOU WON'T GET TO SEE IT BECAUSE BY THEN YOUR SESSION SHOULD BE WIPED OUT BY THE SCRATCH. CG: BUT WE WILL. THE PLAN IS TO USE IT AS A BEACON, AND TRAVEL THERE AS A RENDEZVOUS POINT. EB: rendezvous with who? CG: WE'VE GOT PEOPLE THERE. THAT'S WHAT JADE TELLS ME. EB: jade knows so many things lately, what is even her deal? CG: HELL IF I KNOW, THIS IS BASICALLY DREAM INTELLIGENCE, EVERY TIME SHE GOES TO SLEEP, SHE HAS MORE TO RAMBLE ABOUT. CG: SHE SAYS I SHOULD GO TO SLEEP TO FIND OUT, BUT I'M LIKE HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO BE NAPPING BETWEEN MAKING ALL THESE PLANS AND GETTING PERSECUTED BY THIS DEMENTED HONKING ASSHOLE? CG: SO YEAH, WE'LL MEET IN THE AFTERMATH OF THE EXPLOSION WITH OUR PEOPLE ON THE INSIDE, OR I GUESS I SHOULD SAY OUTSIDE. CG: I DON'T THINK THEY CAN COME WITH US THOUGH. EB: come with you where? who are they? CG: DEAD PEOPLE. CG: AS FOR WHERE, IT'S NOT LIKE WE'RE GOING TO STICK AROUND THERE FOREVER. THAT WOULD PROBABLY BE DEPRESSING, SINCE WE'RE NOT FUCKING GHOSTS. CG: THE SCRATCH WILL REBOOT YOUR SESSION. YOUR WHOLE UNIVERSE ACTUALLY. SO SOMEWHERE IN THIS DREADFUL ABYSS, THAT NEW SESSION WILL START UP IN ITS OWN INCIPISPHERE, FROM SCRATCH. CG: LOOK AT THAT, ANOTHER PUN BECAUSE OF USING THAT FUCKING WORD EVERY OTHER SENTENCE! KILL ME NOW. CG: BUT THAT "FROM SCRATCH" (F'ING LOL!) SESSION IS WHAT YOU'RE SHOOTING FOR TO SURVIVE. CG: THE IDEA IS FOR YOU ALL TO PRESERVE YOURSELVES BY ESCAPING THERE. EB: through the lawn ring? CG: YES. CG: ONCE YOU'RE THERE, YOU WILL HELP US FIND OUR WAY THERE TOO, AND THEN WE CAN ALL FINALLY FIGURE OUT WHAT THE FUCK TO DO WITH THE REST OF OUR LIVES. EB: oh!! EB: so then, this is how we're supposed to meet. that is kind of exciting. CG: YEAH, I GUESS, IF ENOUGH OF US ARE ALIVE BY THEN TO MEET. EB: so, i guess you are not worried about it turning into a huge sloppy makeout fest anymore... CG: UH CG: RIGHT! HAHAHA, JOHN, YOU AND VRISKA BETTER KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELVES, OR EVERYONE'S GOING TO BE REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE. NO INTERSPECIES FUNNYBUSINESS, IS THAT CLEAR! CG: BLAAAAAAARGH, I AM CONVINCINGLY FLIPPING MY LID ABOUT THIS, WAVING MY ARMS AROUND A LOT, AND MAKING ALL MY BEST YELLING FACES. WOW, LOOK AT THAT! IT'S TIME TO CHANGE THE SUBJECT AGAIN. EB: huh? CG: POOF! SUBJECT CHANGED. CG: IF IT WORKS AND YOU WIND UP IN THE NEW SESSION, THAT'S WHY IT'LL BE IMPORTANT TO MAKE SURE ONE OF THE DERSE DREAMERS STAYS WITH YOU, SO THEY CAN HELP GUIDE US THERE FROM THE RING. EB: won't there be other players in the new session? EB: like, alternate universe versions of ourselves or such? CG: PROBABLY. CG: BUT THOSE CHUMPS WON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT US, OR ALL OUR PLANS. WHY WOULD THEY? EB: yeah... it's just kind of a weird thought. CG: SO OUT OF EVERYTHING WE JUST TALKED ABOUT, THIS IS THE THING THAT HAS YOU TRIPPING GLOBES? WHATEVER YOU SAY! EB: but i guess it's sort of comforting too. EB: if rose or dave have to go off and die, at least i get to see them again, in a way. EB: even if i will only be alternate universe john to them. EB: maybe my dad will be alive in that session too!!! CG: OK, MAYBE, BUT BEFORE YOU GET TOO EXCITED ABOUT THAT, YOU'VE GOT TO MAKE SURE YOU GET THERE FIRST. CG: WHICH MEANS YOU HAVE TO DO WHAT I SAY, AND STICK TO THE PLAN. CG: YOU NEED TO FOCUS ON GETTING READY TO START THE SCRATCH. THE GAME DOESN'T MAKE A HARD RESET THAT EASY TO PULL OFF. CG: ONCE YOU INITIATE IT, THE GAME THROWS EVERYTHING IT'S GOT AT YOU. WHICH IS ONE REASON WHY YOU'RE THE BEST GUY FOR THE JOB, BECAUSE OF YOUR SUPERPOWERS AND SILLY WINDY BULLSHIT. EB: ok. i'll do my best. EB: what should i do right now? CG: GET PREPARED, MAKE ALL THE EQUIPMENT YOU THINK YOU'LL NEED, STAY OUT OF TROUBLE. CG: WAIT FOR JADE TO SEND THAT CODE, WAIT FOR ME TO CONTACT YOU FOR THE FIRST TIME, AND DO YOUR BEST TO HUMOR HIM WHILE HE IGNORANTLY ATTEMPTS TO FLAME YOU BACK INTO THE PUDDLE OF SLIME YOU CRAWLED OUT OF. CG: PLEASE. EB: oh, man. EB: our "first" conversation ever? i can't wait. CG: YEAH, BUT CAN I JUST SAY SOMETHING IN MY DEFENSE BEFORE THAT HAPPENS? CG: I DON'T ACTUALLY HATE YOU, AND I NEVER DID. I WAS DELUDING MYSELF. CG: DEEP DOWN I'M SURE I WAS ALWAYS PRETTY OK WITH YOU. EB: thanks karkat! CG: IT WASN'T A FUCKING COMPLIMENT.
Here is one last drop of cool stuff for you to buy before your chimneys are plundered by a mythical oaf.
A new one of these guys, who is red:
Cute stickers?? (yes):
^^^ Due to the adorable nature of these, I will call them another "Hussie Pick". That means 1 sticker sheet in every 100 is GUARANTEED to have been whisked gently by the tail of a playful horse.
If you scroll down a bit, you'll see some new stuff in the store. But there is some even NEWER new stuff, so I'm posting it up here. Higher up means new on the internet, whereas lower down is where yesterday's garbage belongs. (Except wait it's not garbage, it's all still great. Buy everything!!! Whew, nice save. I just saved Christmas.)
^^^ This one by Zack is extra dope, let's call it a "Hussie Pick". That means every single copy sold is GUARANTEED to have been breathed on by a horse.
A friendly reminder that the designated artist for all Calliope art in Homestuck is Shelby Cragg. So please buckle up. We have entered the Shelby zone, and we may be here a little while. She and her pal Taz have also just completed a webcomic which you should also take a moment to check out. It looks good!
Around this time of year, people just seem to be in the mood to buy things. I can't seem to put my finger on it. Could it be enthusiasm over Eat A Red Apple Day? (Cool fact: every day is this day if you are a horse.) Or maybe it's the notorious early shopping rush for Bathtub Party Day. Wait, no, it must be due to the usual hustle and bustle surrounding Oatmeal Muffin Day. That's the ticket.
Actually no, those are all stupid holidays that make no sense to anybody. I will have to remain just plain stumped over this. Nevertheless, What Pumpkin is more than prepared to facilitate your inexplicable 4th quarter spending impulses. Please observe this desirable merchandise which you can computer-click on at any moment of your choosing.
I recommend moseying over to Paradox Space, which is currently running a 24 page comic I have written about Crowbar. I am alert to the desires of readers every single day, and the one thing I hear them clamor for above all else, is more stories about CROWBAR. We want more content about Crowbar, RIGHT NOW, they say, and make that content consist of 24 beautifully illustrated comic pages, MINIMUM. I just give the people what they want.
Fortunately, Homestuck's Premier Felt Fan #1 Jones was available to do a spectacular job of illustrating this comic. My rambling noir-style monologues have never before overlapped such lovely artwork.
Homestuck continues this Saturday, with A6A6A4 posted in its entirety, resuming with the true focus of Homestuck, Caliborn's incredible journey as an artist. Then A6A6I4 starts on Monday, and will continue in a semi-regular manner thereafter, until it is done. I will find some horse calendar pages and illustrate the schedule for your convenience. You are, as always, welcome.
Song is Carne Vale by Malcolm Brown. Always been a big fan of Malcolm's work, so it's cool to kick off the comic again with one of his songs.
Thanks to contributing artists Hanni, Matt, Jon, Rennie, Zack, and Jones. All of whom have contributed to Paradox Space as well. I haven't done a (non-game) Flash with a lot of contributing artists in a while. I think Cascade was the last one? Kind of a throwback to the old Art Team days. Remember that? Actually, the expanded network of PXS artists is almost like Homestuck Art Team 2.0. A number of the (now many) artists involved with that comic have sorta parlayed that work into other HS projects, including stuff for the game (more on that soon). It's been pretty awesome having so many great artists help build on the Homestuck universe.
About the Flash. Or really, A663 as a whole. Truly we are back in the saddle, with bad anime and mass murder - the quintessential Homestuck Experience. A year ago I knew I was going to have to pause for a long time. I made sure to cut it off just before this act, not after. Leaving you hanging on that note for a year... damn. Not even I am that cruel. Now you will only have to wait a week to see what happens next. I will say this much. It sure is a bunch of stuff that happens. The regular update engine lurches back to life on 11/1.
Or maybe, since Halloween is coming up, I should call it The Itinerscary. Especially because we may be in store for some spoooooky server crashes with these first few update dumps. Eep, I'm gettin the willies here!
One page today to test the waters (or uh, yesterday). When that's done and the coast is clear (it won't be), I'll post a bunch of pages on the 17th and 18th (oops, now the 18th and 19th). Then there will be nothing until 10/25. And then nothing until 11/1, at which point regular updates will begin again, according to an update schedule which I will share with you on that day. Then you will know which precise pattern of dates you will need to handcuff yourself to a computer and plug in your custom keyboard that only has a single giant F5 key.
It would seem against my better judgment, or really my ability to control in any way whatsoever, a fair amount of hype has been brewing for the return of Homestuck. People are jacked up. They are doing little dances in places they cannot be seen. They are writhing in kiddie pools of pins and needles for the return of all their favorite fantasy children. "John." "Karkat." And more. So it's hard to avoid finding it just a LITTLE funny that after a year-long drought, hopping back in the saddle means we will have to wade through 50 pages of completely atrocious garbage before anything happens. It's funny how life works out sometimes. Funnier than a clown tickling a horse. Sometimes you pause your famous webcomic for a year, and then your grand reopening is a lot of bad anime. On such occasions, when life hands you those kooky lemons, there is really only one thing you can say.