carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling gardenGnostic [GG] CG: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING NOW. GG: pw. CG: SERIOUSLY, WHY DID YOU GO BACK TO SEE HER? YOU DIDN'T MENTION THIS LAST TIME. GG: listen fuckass GG: i am going to need a password before we continue GG: plz <3 CG: RIGHT, OK. CG: LET'S SEE IF I CAN REMEMBER, IT WAS PRETTY ELABORATE IF I RECALL, OK HERE GOES. CG: I'M A DISGUSTING WORTHLESS BILGESACK ON THE GARGANTUAN TEAT OF A LABORING, LEPROUS MUSCLEBEAST. MY SELF ESTEEM IS SO SMALL, ITS EXISTENCE IS A MATTER OF CONJECTURE AMONG THEORETICAL PHYSICISTS. I SMELL SO BAD, THE STENCH CANNOT BE EXPRESSED WITH EVEN THE MOST ELOQUENT, FLORID LANGUAGE. THE ODOR MY BODY MAKES HAS MADE POETS CRY. I HAVE WON SPECIAL AWARDS FOR DISCOVERING NEW PLACES TO TOUCH MYSELF EROTICALLY WHILE FARTING. I UNFAIRLY PULVERIZE THE COMPETITION IN ASSHOLE PAGEANTS, AND I HAVE RECEIVED A LIFETIME BAN FROM UGLY CONTESTS BY PRESIDENT SHITFACE HIMSELF. MY BLOOD IS NOT FIT TO FLOW THROUGH A SEWER, AND MY SIGN IS A PICTOGRAPHIC SYMBOL THAT LOOSELY TRANSLATES AS "PLEASE HIKE THESE PANTS UP TO THIS GUY'S ARMPITS, CHAIN HIM TO A FLOGGING JUT, AND MAKE A FUCKING EXAMPLE OUT OF THIS SORRY SACK OF SHIT." WHEN I LOOK IN A MIRROR, MY REFLECTION SLOWLY SHAKES HIS HEAD WHILE I WET MYSELF IN SHAME. GG: ....................... :| CG: WHAT, THAT WAS IT, WASN'T IT. HOW WAS THAT NOT FUCKING IT, DID I FORGET AN APOSTROPHE SOMEWHERE? GG: no karkat, that was not quite the password GG: but you were on the right track :p CG: CAN WE JUST TALK NOW GG: do you even remember the right password? CG: SOMETHING ALONG THE LINES OF GRATUITOUS SELF DEPRECATION FORCED INTO MY MOUTH, INVOLVING REFERENCE TO SOME KIND OF WEIRD HUMAN COUPLING RITUAL? GG: youre being deliberately dumb GG: it was... GG: IF I HATE MYSELF SO MUCH, THEN WHY DON'T I HATEMARRY MYSELF? GG: remember? GG: i was just using the password system to poke a little fun at you, and you turn it into this whole overdramatic thing, jeeeeez. CG: HAHA! WHEE. CG: CAN WE GET DOWN TO FUCKING BUSINESS AGAIN?
Song is Carne Vale by Malcolm Brown. Always been a big fan of Malcolm's work, so it's cool to kick off the comic again with one of his songs.
Thanks to contributing artists Hanni, Matt, Jon, Rennie, Zack, and Jones. All of whom have contributed to Paradox Space as well. I haven't done a (non-game) Flash with a lot of contributing artists in a while. I think Cascade was the last one? Kind of a throwback to the old Art Team days. Remember that? Actually, the expanded network of PXS artists is almost like Homestuck Art Team 2.0. A number of the (now many) artists involved with that comic have sorta parlayed that work into other HS projects, including stuff for the game (more on that soon). It's been pretty awesome having so many great artists help build on the Homestuck universe.
About the Flash. Or really, A663 as a whole. Truly we are back in the saddle, with bad anime and mass murder - the quintessential Homestuck Experience. A year ago I knew I was going to have to pause for a long time. I made sure to cut it off just before this act, not after. Leaving you hanging on that note for a year... damn. Not even I am that cruel. Now you will only have to wait a week to see what happens next. I will say this much. It sure is a bunch of stuff that happens. The regular update engine lurches back to life on 11/1.
But as of typing this, by my watch, 10/25 isn't over yet, and technically neither is the update day. Hmm.
Caliborn's self insert guy is a nod to some classic fan art from 4 years ago, which to my memory was the first speculative drawing of LE before he was introduced. Thanks to the artists for the inspiration.
Or maybe, since Halloween is coming up, I should call it The Itinerscary. Especially because we may be in store for some spoooooky server crashes with these first few update dumps. Eep, I'm gettin the willies here!
One page today to test the waters (or uh, yesterday). When that's done and the coast is clear (it won't be), I'll post a bunch of pages on the 17th and 18th (oops, now the 18th and 19th). Then there will be nothing until 10/25. And then nothing until 11/1, at which point regular updates will begin again, according to an update schedule which I will share with you on that day. Then you will know which precise pattern of dates you will need to handcuff yourself to a computer and plug in your custom keyboard that only has a single giant F5 key.
It would seem against my better judgment, or really my ability to control in any way whatsoever, a fair amount of hype has been brewing for the return of Homestuck. People are jacked up. They are doing little dances in places they cannot be seen. They are writhing in kiddie pools of pins and needles for the return of all their favorite fantasy children. "John." "Karkat." And more. So it's hard to avoid finding it just a LITTLE funny that after a year-long drought, hopping back in the saddle means we will have to wade through 50 pages of completely atrocious garbage before anything happens. It's funny how life works out sometimes. Funnier than a clown tickling a horse. Sometimes you pause your famous webcomic for a year, and then your grand reopening is a lot of bad anime. On such occasions, when life hands you those kooky lemons, there is really only one thing you can say.
Happy 4/13, a.k.a. 5 years of Homestuck being a thing! Since I know how much you like things, to celebrate I thought I would show you another thing that's been in the works for a while.
It's a new webcomic based on Homestuck, called Paradox Space! Have a look. That is all I will say about it here. But if you would like to know what the heck this ACTUALLY IS, here is a permalink to the news post where I talk about such matters.